How To Use A Midlife Crisis as an Opportunity to Embrace Change and Unlock New Possibilities
An Interview With Shawna Robins
I was born in Bradford, Yorkshire, in the UK, as an only child, constantly adapting to new environments as my dad’s job took us across the UK. From a young age, I learned to shapeshift, switching accents and personalities to blend in, desperate to be accepted. I was bullied for being different, for my voice, for my body, and so I shrank parts of myself to feel safe. That pattern followed me into adulthood: I married young, built a successful corporate career, and played the part society told me I should. Yet behind the polished façade, I always felt like a square peg in a round hole, someone with a wild soul silenced by the need to conform.
My career began in dietetics, inspired by my own complex relationship with food and body image. I eventually pivoted into food product development, working with major brands and launching products many still buy today. But despite the success, I felt disconnected from purpose. My life started to unravel in layers through burnout, redundancy, spiritual curiosity, and an intuitive pull that whispered this isn’t who you truly are. I retrained as an image consultant and began to integrate my love of personal style with deeper transformational work. Slowly, the pieces began to click into place.
Can you share a story with us about what brought you to your particular career path?
Rebellious Essence was born from my soul’s uprising. In 2022, I went through the most profound spiritual awakening of my life leaving a 26-year marriage, shedding the home and status I once clung to, and releasing identities that no longer served me. Everything fell apart and came back together in a way that felt divinely orchestrated. I travelled solo, immersed myself in astrology, human design, and coaching, and began the brave work of meeting myself without masks. The journey was gut-wrenching, liberating, and electric with truth.
I created Rebellious Essence because I knew other midlife women needed a place like this, a sanctuary where transformation isn’t about fixing, but about remembering who we are. My mission is to help women feel seen, heard, and radically empowered. I blend my background in nutrition and styling with energy work, soulful rituals, and lived experience, creating retreats and mentoring spaces that invite calm, clarity, and courageous reinvention.
You are a successful leader. Which three character traits do you think were most instrumental to your success? Can you please share a story or example for each?
Resilience
I’ve navigated profound personal upheaval, leaving a 26-year marriage, releasing a long-standing career, and stepping into solo living after decades of family life. My resilience wasn’t just surviving those chapters but transforming through them. The year I supported my mum through mental illness while untangling my own life and it felt like everything was collapsing at once. But I rose. I rebuilt not by rushing forward but by facing my shadows, one layer at a time. I now teach women that breakdowns can be breakthroughs because I’ve lived it.
Authenticity
For years, I adapted, changing accents to fit in as a child, dimming my voice for fear of being “too bossy” or “too much.” I knew how to be liked, but I didn’t know how to be me. Rebellious Essence was born from the moment I stopped performing and started embodying my truth. Now, I give women full permission to own who they are, not the roles they’ve been handed. Whether it’s choosing a hypnobirth, walking away from the rat race, or expressing a style that reflects their soul, I remind them: being different isn’t a flaw, it’s their calling.
Intuition
My biggest leaps came when I trusted the quiet nudges, even when logic said wait. From retraining as an image consultant despite a lucrative career, to stepping into spiritual practices that brought deep personal healing, intuition has always been my compass. I didn’t have a roadmap when I dismantled the life I’d built , just a feeling that something else was waiting. That faith in my inner knowing is what I now model for other women. Your intuition is never random, it’s your highest self speaking.
What are some of the most interesting or exciting projects you are working on now?
I’m thrilled to be launching my new brand, Rebellious Essence, and hosting our very first retreat The Ibiza Immersion this September. This marks the beginning of an extraordinary chapter, with bold plans to expand globally by 2026. We’re developing a rich tapestry of retreat experiences tailored to different timeframes, budgets, and locations, making transformation truly accessible. And that’s just the beginning there will be specially curated products, signature merchandise, and soulful services are all in the pipeline to elevate the journey even further.
Let’s now shift to the main part of our interview. Let’s start with a basic definition, so that everyone is on the same page. How do you define the idea of “Midlife Crisis”?
I’m here to prove that midlife isn’t a crisis, it’s a portal back to your essence, your power, and your joy. As someone deeply fascinated by astrology, I understand that our 40s and 50s bring key planetary shifts that invite deep reflection, self-care, and inner healing. When we’ve spent years putting others first, this stage can feel like life is collapsing and it’s often when menopause symptoms hit hardest. But I believe it’s not a breakdown, it’s a breakthrough.
In our 50s, we experience our Chiron return, a powerful time to face long-held wounds, transform them, and alchemize pain into wisdom. It might feel like chaos, but it’s actually your soul calling you back into alignment with your true path. When we’re equipped with this knowledge, midlife and menopause become opportunities to understand ourselves more deeply and re-launch into the second half of life with purpose, vitality, and clarity. I’ve lived it and I’m here to guide women through this exhilarating transition, so they can reclaim their power and embrace who they’re truly here to be.
What are the most common signs that someone is experiencing a midlife crisis?
Feeling lost, stuck, burned out, or questioning their purpose, this is the reality for many midlife women. The activities and roles that once felt fulfilling begin to feel misaligned, and things they’ve done for years suddenly stop fitting. As the identities of mother, wife, daughter, and colleague start to shift, they often find themselves asking, “Who the hell am I?”
This sense of disconnection can show up as relationship struggles, career uncertainty, and a deep discomfort in expressing their true selves, simply because they’ve been out of touch with their essence for so long. Years of putting everyone else’s needs first leaves little room for their own. What they’re experiencing isn’t failure, it’s the stirrings of a deeper calling. And I’m here to help them answer it.
Beyond the cliches, what are some of the lesser-discussed challenges that people face during midlife?
Many midlife women are quietly navigating an intense, internal transformation. The roles they’ve held, mother, wife, daughter, colleague begin to shift, and the identities that once gave them purpose start to feel misaligned. It’s not just burnout or questioning their career path, it’s a deeper unraveling. The hobbies, relationships, and routines they once clung to no longer feel like home, and they often find themselves asking, “Who the hell am I?”
Beneath the surface, there’s grief for the parts of themselves they abandoned to survive, and unease at the silence where joy once lived. Inherited family dynamics and ancestral patterns rise, asking to be healed. Longstanding relationships may feel strained, not from conflict, but because they’re out of sync with who she’s becoming.
There’s also the invisible emotional weight of becoming a caregiver to aging parents, navigating complex decisions, while potentially still parenting adult children, all while holding their own unmet needs. Add to that the “empty nest” transition, which can feel jarring. The home grows quieter, routines shift, and a woman is finally alone with herself.
Do you think societal pressures or expectations play a role in triggering or exacerbating a midlife crisis? If so, how?
Yes absolutely, women are often mocked for having menopausal symptoms such as hot flushes or brain fog or ‘senior moments’ with a complete lack of empathy for this important life transition. Women are expected to hold it all together and fulfill all the roles of career woman, housewife, mother, wife, carer all without anyone’s support or acknowledgement of the constant multi-tasking they do. The slightest flaw in this performance is often met with mockery and judgement which only adds to the discomfort and feeling that there is something wrong with her.
What mindset shifts are essential for transforming a midlife crisis into a period of renewal and positive change?
Knowledge and education are powerful here. Midlife shouldn’t be portrayed as the beginning of a decline, it’s the spark of a re-birth. Once a woman realises there are ways to consciously navigate this chapter, the power shift begins. Suddenly, everything that once felt confusing or heavy transforms into an invitation: to step into alignment physically, emotionally, and spiritually.
This stage isn’t a crisis, it’s a recalibration into the wise woman archetype. But too few know this. For too long, media narratives have sold midlife as something to fear, fix, or fade from. What we need now is a revolution in storytelling, one that celebrates our lived wisdom, our experience, and our unapologetic re-launch.
When women are supported, informed, and witnessed, this chapter becomes a portal to their most magnetic, meaningful selves. The empty nest doesn’t signal an ending; it’s a spacious new beginning. One where she’s finally at the centre of her own life. And from there? The shine is unstoppable.
Can you share a personal or client success story where a midlife crisis led to a transformative life reset?
As I’ve already mentioned my own transition was quite something but I’d also love to share some client experiences with you too. Midlife isn’t a breakdown, it’s a breakthrough. No one embodies this truth better than Jill. When we met, she was bold, unapologetic, and ready to embrace her essence. The moment she told me her style icon was Bet Lynch, fearlessly rocking leopard print, I knew she was one of my people.
During our style session, we unearthed the quiet battle so many women face, the tug-of-war between expectation and authenticity. Jill arrived wearing a ditsy floral dress (tags still on), symbolic of who she thought she ‘should’ be. But then she pulled out leather jeans and a sequined “FIERCE” tee and just like that, I saw her real essence emerge. The wild, the bold, the woman she’d tucked away. She didn’t need fixing. She needed permission. Watching Jill reclaim her style and her soul was pure magic.
Another example can be seen in a client who arrived during the pandemic, completely disconnected from her body, from her joy, from her sense of femininity. Menopause had stripped away not just hormones, but self-worth. She didn’t know how much she needed support until we met.
She described our session as finding a distant beacon of light that grew closer, illuminating possibility, grace, and reawakening. Through our work together, she didn’t just shift style; she shifted identity. She stepped into post-menopause womanhood with sensuality, strength, and unshakable joy.
This is what midlife gets to look like. When women are guided, witnessed, and empowered, they don’t just reset, they rebirth. And they do it in leopard print.
How can someone overcome the fear of starting over later in life?
By understanding that this is a death of an old identity and an exciting new chapter to start again and relaunch yourself. Of course all change can feel scary and I have been there. When you educate women about what is happening and support them to know they are not alone then together we can create mid life magic and help them step into their true souls purpose. I would present it as a positive chance to be in alignment maybe for the first time in their lives and that this is now their time to be valued and to prioritise themselves. As they say we need to “Feel the fear and do it anyway”. I am here to support women every step of the way and help them unleash their Rebellious Essence.
Ok. Here is the main question of our discussion. Can you please share “5 Ways To Use A Midlife Crisis as an Opportunity to Embrace Change and Unlock New Possibilities”? If you can, kindly share a story or example for each.
Five Words That Turn Midlife Crisis into Midlife Magic:
Rebellious
Midlife is your permission slip to break the rules you never agreed to. It’s time to unleash your inner rebel in how you dress, how you speak, what you learn, and the risks you finally take. Want to retrain in something you’ve always loved? Start a business that lights you up? Rock leather trousers at 50? Helen Mirren doesn’t ask “Am I too old for this?” She wears the damn leopard print and redefines aging. You can too. Find role models who live unapologetically and become one yourself.
Essence
This is the perfect moment to explore the “just-right” dose of something new, be it astrology, Reiki, journaling, dancing like no one’s watching, or sacred rituals under a full moon. These are your Essences , the soul-sparking ingredients that connect you to your core. Your true essence is who you were before the world told you who to be. Use tools like astrology readings, vision boarding, or soul-searching prompts to meet her again.
Freedom
Freedom means choosing you. Saying yes to solo travel, to quiet mornings, to walking away from what no longer fits. I went to Italy alone last year, and it changed everything, not one person questioned me, and my confidence soared. When you remove the need to please everyone else, you discover the joy of pleasing yourself. That’s real liberation.
Abundance
Abundance isn’t just about money, it’s about living with more. More time. More self-care. More space to rest and rise. Define what abundance means to you and let go of scarcity thinking. Invest in yourself like you would a loved one, your joy isn’t a luxury, it’s your new baseline.
Transformation
Midlife is a transformation as potent as puberty or motherhood. It’s messy, beautiful, sacred and it’s yours to claim. You have full permission to evolve, to shed skin, to become someone that even you haven’t met yet. Will you upset some people along the way? Possibly. But if you do, tell them Josie at Rebellious Essence said you could !
What role does self-compassion play in navigating a midlife crisis?
It is crucial, no positive change or shift happens from a place of blame, shame or judgement of ourselves. It is a natural life stage and again the more knowledge we have through education and promoting mid life as an exciting transformation, the more we can be kind to ourselves and actually look forward to it and embrace the chance to start a brand new chapter as who we came here to be and create the life we want.
How important is physical health when navigating life changes in midlife?
So important, my beliefs are that many of the difficult symptoms of peri menopause and menopause could be prevented or managed if we learnt to take care of our physical body in our 30’s and 40’s. Many women are burnt out physically, mentally and emotionally from carrying the burdens of the family and professional dynamic for decades. All of the feminism from the 80’s and 90’s where we were taught that we could have it all and to be like men in order to succeed have caused us to set ourselves unrealistic standards and many women are just exhausted from trying to be everything to everyone and so have not been able to care for and nurture themselves. This often results in a really tough transition through their mid life.
How can someone maintain the momentum and positive changes made during a midlife reset for the long term?
Maintaining momentum after a midlife reset isn’t just about discipline, it’s about devotion to the new version of yourself you’ve uncovered. The initial spark of transformation is powerful, but sustaining it requires conscious integration. That means weaving the insights, habits, and shifts into your everyday life, not just reserving them for retreats or breakthroughs. It’s about creating rituals that anchor your growth, surrounding yourself with people who reflect your evolution, and regularly checking in with your values to ensure you’re still aligned.
This is exactly why I do the work I do. I help women move beyond the “aha” moment and into lasting embodiment, through transformational mentoring, styling, and immersive retreats that don’t just inspire change, but support it long after the suitcase is unpacked. I’m inspired by the women who dare to rise, and I’m here to walk beside them as they build lives that reflect their essence, not their old roles. Because the reset isn’t the end it’s the beginning of a life lived on purpose.
How can our readers further follow your work online?
Website: www.rebelliousessence.com
Instagram https://www.instagram.com/rebelliousessence/
Facebook https://www.facebook.com/rebelliousessence.official/
Linked In https://www.linkedin.com/in/josie-hamilton-cook-a967379/
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